How to dispose of a roach

1. Scream.
2. Scoop up and lock curious toddler who discovered the roach in the bedroom.
3. Take several deep breaths and pray the two-inch long creature doesn't move.
4. Get a measuring cup (it's used as a bathtime toy) from the bathtub.
5. Lower the cup over the roach. Try not to scream.
6. Go get packing tape and scissors.
7. Tape the measuring cup to the carpet using at least 10 pieces of tape. (No chance that little bugger is getting out.
8. Wait until your husband comes home.

By the way, neither six hours taped under a measuring cup nor the first flush down the toilet killed this roach. I just pray he doesn't have friends.