Thursday, February 26, 2009

What every mother knows

There are some things that no one ever tells you about being a mother. You just find out as you go along. Here are just a few (in no particular order):
  1. You will wind up nursing an infant or reading a book to a toddler while sitting on the toilet because you can't get a potty break any other way.
  2. You will get more done in one day on less sleep than you ever did when you had no children. (Remember when going to the post office and the bank in one day was a major accomplishment?)
  3. You will understand nearly every whine, grunt and groan your toddler utters even as you insist that he "use his words." (This will amaze you because your nieces' and nephews' utterances were never so clear.)
  4. You will look forward to nap time before you even go to bed the night before.
  5. You will lose your dignity to toddler who announces "Poop mommy" every time you pass gas (which happens often when your pregnant, by the way).
  6. You will know how much time you have to get in and out of a grocery store before your toddler begins to melt down.
  7. Your creativity will be sparked as you determine how to spend your first week alone with two children when ALL your usual activities have been canceled.
  8. You will hide in the bathroom to eat cookies, candy and anything else you don't want to share.
  9. You will be able to tell what your child ate in the past 24 hours just by looking at a poopy diaper.
  10. Your love for your children will be immeasurable even as you're sure that you won't survive toddlerhood with your sanity intact.

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