Thursday, September 02, 2010


It's been a rough week. I say that pretty often, don't I? It's been a while since we've had any illness around here, but this week, the baby got his first cold and shared it with the rest of us. I've been puked, peed, snotted, pooped and drooled on this week a lot. A friend told me Wednesday that I'm looking quite beautiful these days and later suggested that perhaps my new "beauty cream" had something to do with it. Perhaps. If so, it's the cheapest beauty regimen ever.

Anyway ... I want to start some kind of Friday tradition that I may possibly be able to stick with and would offer something unique and funny to my followers (all 12 of you ... which is the exact number of Jesus' disciples. Hm.). A week or so ago, I started to write down funny things uttered around here. It's entirely possible that these things are funny to me because I'm so very sleep deprived. Somehow, though, I've had the presence of mind to keep a notebook and pen handy in the kitchen and have actually written a few things down. Here's our first list:

Don't drink from your shoe. My daughter decided to help herself to some liquid refreshment by dipping her sandal in the water
table I'd set up.

Don't throw grapes at the baby's head. I honestly don't remember who was doing this.

Don't climb the fridge. Fiona, of course.

Get out of the kitchen sink. You guessed it. Fiona.

JIM, SHE'S GOT A KNIFE. Okay, so that one was only funny in retrospect. Fiona had grabbed a bread knife that we'd forgotten to put behind the faucet. That's the only place in the kitchen that is out of her reach. For now.

No, we're not going to play basketball with potatoes. They don't bounce, dear. An actual answer to this question from my 3 year old who was holding two potatoes: "It's okay to play basketball with these?"

Let's sing the rock n' roll clean up song. Danny made this up all on his own. I swear. It involves head banging and a few rock 'n roll-like grunts interspersed with "Clean up." He even sang this song to his preschool teacher on Wednesday during clean-up time.

Don't eat that. I don't remember the last time we had Cheez-its. My husband said this to Fiona while cleaning out the minivan, or, as I like to call it, the trash can on wheels. 

Put your shirt down, Danny. We don't say hello with our belly buttons.  'Nuff said.

I can't see. I can't see. It's dark. Danny began to cry and scream this after his preschool teacher asked the kids to close their eyes for a prayer.

Monkey see, monkey pee.
So there you have it—a smattering of words overheard around here that you never thought would be in the same sentence. Feel free to add your own. Comment or e-mail me (address is on my profile to the left). I could always use a good laugh (and I'm pretty easy to amuse these days).

Oh, and does anyone want to guess what's going on in this photo? Potty training is going to be quite interesting this time around.

Have a great Labor Day weekend.


Cassidy, Lily and Finn's Mom said...

Love it! Thanks! I can always use a good laugh as I am dragging myself into my day. :)

Anonymous said...

When my son was about 3, he said, "Mom, I don't really like Jesus anymore."

After my double-take, I realized he meant Cheez-Its.


Josee said...

Oh, Laurie, I just laughed so hard I snorted! Thank you for that!