The really, really hidden costs of kids

A lot of what they're counting in this total are things we would have spent money on anyway: food, transportation, housing.

We save a lot of money by doing things just a bit differently. We don't participate in too many classes for our kids. At their age, we can barely get them to follow our instructions, so we're certainly not going to pay for them to ignore other people's instructions. We don't buy new clothes, books or toys on a regular basis; we let Nana do that. We don't buy a lot of prepackaged foods. We don't have cable. In fact, when we want to watch a certain channel, my husband goes into the attic to readjust the antenna. (Not even kidding here.) We have pay-go cell phones that we rarely use and usually can't even remember our phone number.

I know this sounds quite spartan and rather boring, but, trust me, our children provide enough entertainment that we don't feel deprived.

The costs that really bite us in the bum are ones we don't really expect. At all. I mean, we expect that with all the laundry we're doing that our water bill is going to go up. In fact, the city has this depressing little graphic on our bill that shows our consumption month by month over the year. With the addition of each kid, we see a spike in water consumption, presumably from the increase in laundry.

However, nothing really prepares you for this:

I came home from being out for 4 hours with the kids to find the faucet running in the bathtub. I'm expecting a very high water bill. And possibly a high electric bill as I now can't remember if it was the hot or cold water that was running.

Other hidden water costs? The five-minute hand-washing sessions and the toddler with a toilet-flushing habit. And daily baths. And children who are fascinated with and know how to turn on the hose. 

And toilet paper. No one mentions how much toilet paper you go through. Even before we had potty trained children. In fact, it started during my first pregnancy when I had to pee every hour or so. Currently, I have two potty trained kids who have no clue about the appropriate amount of toilet paper per visit and a baby who practically beats down the door to get a taste, yes, a taste of toilet paper. He eats the stuff. We buy it at Sam's Club in bulk. It has its own line in the budget.

Other hidden costs that have occurred to me lately?

Parental mental health: Diet Coke, Luna Bars, candy that we sneak in the closet or the car. I never drank this much Diet Coke before I had kids. Nor did I eat that much candy.

Baby wipes: They're not just for bottoms. They wash faces, windows, mirrors, hands, feet, legs, arms, hair and even walls and doors. These also have their own line in the budget.

Food: Our children enter the kitchen at 7 a.m. and don't stop inhaling food until 7 p.m. They beg for food all day. We go through more fruit, veggies and cheese than anyone I know.