Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Study hard, this WILL be on the quiz

Ever wonder why moms seem to just know every little detail about their surroundings? For instance, my husband can ask where something is while I'm two rooms away and I can tell him the exact location without leaving my seat or even thinking twice.

"Where's the ketchup?"

"On the second fridge door shelf from the bottom behind the Worcestshire sauce and next to the half and half."

I can even locate items that I haven't seen or thought of in weeks, if not months. The bulb syringe? In the blue basket on top of the baby's dresser underneath a roll of wallpaper border with which I intended to paper the baby's room ... eventually. The pumpking carving tools? In the silverware draw in a baggy tucked behind the tray. I can also locate items that my children have wandered off with. The magnetic shapes for the MagnaDoodle? Dumped in the diaper basket. The sippy cup of milk from breakfast? Beneath the stairs to the TV room on the right, not the left, side of the subwoofer. My husband thinks that just because things are not in the most logical place that I've misplaced them. But I know exactly where just about everything in this house is and could tell you within at least five minutes of being asked. Try me.

Yes, I have mom GPS. I've recently discovered the reason for this phenomenon and the reason is 3-feet-tall, is 3-years-old and speaks not sentences but in questions.

It starts upon awakening every morning with a "Where's Daddy?" and continues throughout the day ... 

What's that? What's that noise? Where's this? Where's that? Where's Daddy? (while Daddy is standing right in front of him) Where's Nana's house? Where's our house? (he asks while we're inside our house ... really.) 

I'm on my toes all day long, answering question after question, locating toys, snacks, shoes, cups, socks, and underwear, identifying all manner of objects, foods and beverages, and every speck of dirt, dust and lint the boy picks up. For a while, for every question, I had an answer or at least an attempted answer. But lately, I've wised up. He obviously knows the answer to a lot of these questions. Often he asks where someone is when that someone is standing right in front of him. (and after a long day with him, this is the question that just sends me right over the edge ... yes, I've actually run screaming from the room much to his and his sister's delight.) 

Apparently, he's just quizzing me.

My latest strategy is to simply repeat the question back to him (about a hundred times a day).

"I don't know, Danny. Where is Daddy?"


And he answers, "He's at work, getting cupcakes." He pauses and nods meaningful, "And dinner for everybody." (Daddy's a chef, who, oddly enough, has never once brought home cupcakes or even discussed them in front of Danny.)

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